" Ur ee." " Ur ee." " Ur ee, ur ee, ur ee." I am trying to pretend that I do not hear Dennis, once again, wake me at 3 am to turn him over.
" Ur ee, ur ee, ur ee, ur ee!"
I feel bad for him, but I cannot tell you how much I hate being woken up in the middle of the night. I roll over and then I feel guilty because I am able to roll over. So I get out of bed and roll him over from his left side to his right side. This time I am able to go back to sleep with ease.
A while back, I received an email from Angi, whose mother has MSA. She had recently moved her mother into assisted living because she could no longer care for herself. But, her mother was getting into trouble because she called for help so often.
I understand both sides. Dennis does need help with quite a few movements that most of us take for granted. On the other hand, I do tire of hearing, " Aaaaaaaaaannnnn," 30 times a day.
I suppose all diseases are unfair.
I hate what Alzheimer's is doing to my mother. She gets argumentative and frustrated. She feels that people she meets think she is stupid. She can't remember how to change stations on the TV using a remote. This is unfair to a woman who is extremely bright and articulate.
Even so, Dennis's disease seems particularly unfair. In four short years, he has gone from playing tennis weekly to not being able to walk without a walker and a personal aid. Four years ago, we would share nightly stories and now his speech has been reduced to vowels and some hard consonants.
I could go on, but why? I think I will close for now and celebrate all that we still have, together.
Until later,
Ann and Dennis
2 comments:
Oh Ann, I wish there was something that could be said or done to make everything alright. Of course, there isn't, and that stinks too. There are many people out here in cyber space that really care for you and Dennis and your Mom, and wonder why life is so unfair and unpredictable. All I can think of is that old saw: Hang in there!
I'm right there with you today Ann. My poor dad gets the "Diiiiiick" all day and the calls in the middle of the night. My mom has gotten to the stage where her legs are gone, pretty much in a weeks time. She is now using the bathroom in her diaper and constantly asking to be changed. I know that won't go over in a home very well and I wonder how much longer my dad can even keep her at home. Seems like some days he can't do anything to suit her. Hospice is coming in Friday, so I hope my dad will finally get a break. Mom is going to take more skilled care from now on, since she will more than likely be bed bound from here on in.
Debra
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