It was a long day - with driving, doctor visits and test, pooping and cleaning up. We had settled into our hotel room and decided to find a place to have a dessert before retiring for the evening. We were both exhausted, but we weren't quite ready to watch TV in bed. There just isn't much else to do in a cheap hotel room, and the book I brought was not calling to me.
We cleaned up, to the best of our abilities, and headed out through the crazy subway and sky way system of Rochester. Rochester is all about the business of hospitals, clinics, research, hotels and restaurants. The subway, and sky way walkways seem to be add-ons, to ensure shopping and eating while making your way around the tiny downtown area in the cold of Minnesota winters. They aren't efficient or direct, but then I am spoiled by the great sky-way system of downtown Minneapolis.
We were off. We weren't venturing too far, just to a hotel a few blocks away. We turned down the wrong hallway, when Dennis said, "Take me back to the room."
We had crabbed at each other all day. He was demanding too much, and I was bossing him around too much. It took me 7 minutes to eat my lunch time burger, it took him 40 minutes to eat half of his. He needed to be cleaned up a few times because of pooping issues, and I didn't feel like cleaning up crap all day. The list of complaints we had were trivial, and really just frustrations that life wasn't feeling quite fair at this particular place and time.
Today was day one of the test. Tomorrow we will find out, we hope, that he does not really have MSA or Shy-Drager. I suppose this was weighing on us all day, too.
Monday, February 2, 2009
Sunday, February 1, 2009
Super Bowl Sunday
Oh, gawd. It is Super Bowl Sunday. Dennis has the TV tuned to the game, 2 hours before it is scheduled to start. This is the longest football day of the year. He is even sitting on one of the leather chairs, for the event. His lap is covered with salsa and chips and he is sucking on a Coke.
The perfect football zombie.
I imagine there is a positive side to being a football zombie. He has a way to relax and ignore the outside world. Well, all but 90 football players, several coaches, many high cost ads, etc, etc, etc. At least politics, world woes, economics, an irritating disease and his partner mean nothing to him for a few hours each Sunday.
I have my own diversions. This is just one of his. I admit that I do not understand this particular means of letting go. I suppose that he does not truly comprehend mine, either.
So I will make the special Super Bowl dinner and try to watch TV with him for a few hours. But, most importantly, I will try not to complain too loudly or too often.
The perfect football zombie.
I imagine there is a positive side to being a football zombie. He has a way to relax and ignore the outside world. Well, all but 90 football players, several coaches, many high cost ads, etc, etc, etc. At least politics, world woes, economics, an irritating disease and his partner mean nothing to him for a few hours each Sunday.
I have my own diversions. This is just one of his. I admit that I do not understand this particular means of letting go. I suppose that he does not truly comprehend mine, either.
So I will make the special Super Bowl dinner and try to watch TV with him for a few hours. But, most importantly, I will try not to complain too loudly or too often.
Saturday, January 31, 2009
The Good Fight
We have been on a few missions this week, trying to fight the good fight. We didn't make much headway, however.
The insurance story you already know. We visited his doctor at the Struther's clinic and she agreed to refer us to the Mayo clinic, but the insurance company turned us down one more time. We aren't finished, but we do need to find another tactic before proceeding.
The other issue is about our condo. Our windows are iced up and dripping with water. The builders say it is too much humidity - well, duh. They say we our causing too much humidity by taking a shower a day and cooking occasionally. The humidity problem has nothing to do with the construction of the condo.
I am taking the weekend to not think about any battles of any type. I have absolutely no interest in trying to figure out the next step at this moment. When I have re-energized , I will take up the fight once again. Right now, my brain needs a rest.
Until later,
Dennis and Ann
The insurance story you already know. We visited his doctor at the Struther's clinic and she agreed to refer us to the Mayo clinic, but the insurance company turned us down one more time. We aren't finished, but we do need to find another tactic before proceeding.
The other issue is about our condo. Our windows are iced up and dripping with water. The builders say it is too much humidity - well, duh. They say we our causing too much humidity by taking a shower a day and cooking occasionally. The humidity problem has nothing to do with the construction of the condo.
I am taking the weekend to not think about any battles of any type. I have absolutely no interest in trying to figure out the next step at this moment. When I have re-energized , I will take up the fight once again. Right now, my brain needs a rest.
Until later,
Dennis and Ann
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
Insurance - Yuck
Yes, you should be hearing the results of our visit to the movement disorder neurologist at Mayo today.
But you will not here anything about new tests, or anything of that nature. Dennis' insurance decided that they would not cover the visit. They decided that he does not need to go out of network, since there are in-network doctors that are specialists, too.
I guess they don't know me very well. I will not give up without a fight.
So, I took the two days off, spent time on the phone and writing emails. Dennis made an emergency appointment with his neurologist here for tomorrow. We are also working through the research part of Mayo to help us out.
In the meantime, it is off to Rochester next Monday and Tuesday for that long put off radio active test. At least we will have a final decision on whether Dennis has Shy-Drager or not.
Until Later
Ann and Dennis
But you will not here anything about new tests, or anything of that nature. Dennis' insurance decided that they would not cover the visit. They decided that he does not need to go out of network, since there are in-network doctors that are specialists, too.
I guess they don't know me very well. I will not give up without a fight.
So, I took the two days off, spent time on the phone and writing emails. Dennis made an emergency appointment with his neurologist here for tomorrow. We are also working through the research part of Mayo to help us out.
In the meantime, it is off to Rochester next Monday and Tuesday for that long put off radio active test. At least we will have a final decision on whether Dennis has Shy-Drager or not.
Until Later
Ann and Dennis
Sunday, January 25, 2009
Friday Evening
Recently, I mentioned that we had found a new resource called Pathways. It offers free classes for people with debilitating illnesses and their care-givers. We signed up for a one-time class and attended it on Friday evening.
The written description of the 4 hour class sounded interesting. How do you keep your soul and heart healthy when your life is crumbling. At least that is how I interpreted the outline.
Okay, I believe almost anything and everything is possible. I know that we are living in fields of energy and some of us are receptive and open to different types of energy. I have never seen a ghost, but I know that some people believe they have. I believe that each of us finds what it is that we need to keep whole and happy. Finally, just to end this paragraph, I think each of us has our very own definition of whole and happy.
The course was not a course at all, but a circle of believers channeling their ancestors. Dennis and I were the only ones that were unaware of what the evening entailed. But both of said we wanted to try something different, and this definitly fit that bill.
The theory behind what is called "Constellations" is that we are all protected and our lives are affected by seven generations before us and we in turn protect and affect the lives of seven generations in front of us. We have healthy and unhealthy ancestors, and we can ask them to guide us and protect us. Again, this is my interpretation, and since I didn't get any of this from reading the course description, take it for what it is worth.
So here we were, sitting in this group of believers, two fairly open minded skeptics.
There were to be two constellations that evening, and we would all take part in both. We would either be the person to be healed, a receptor or a active audience participant. We were both okay with the last, but, unfortunately, we both ended up being receptors.
A receptor, by my definition, was playing a role assigned by the facilitator. I think, however, a receptor was actually suppose to channel the ancestor, and speak the words the ancestor wanted to speak.
No one ever spoke to me or Dennis, but they sure were speaking to some of the participants.
I won't bore you with the details, but a few highlights are worth repeating.
We had the woman from Belgium that played a healthy ancestor, and was suppose to be supporting the mother of the little girl who was being healed. She was a lousy healthy ancestor, wailing and crying loudly through the whole experience. I wouldn't have minded that so much, but the facilitator kept making us repeat the whole process every single time she broke down.
There was the woman who played the mother who just couldn't get her role correct. The facilitator asked her if she drank, and the woman said, "No." Aw, crap, we had to go through the whole think again until she finally admitted she drank. The woman couldn't pick up a cue for love or money. I think the only thing she really wanted was hugs and demanded them of everyone.
I guess the rest of the people were normal, they just believed and felt something that neither of us could.
Half way through the process, I pictured my dad standing up, yelling, with due distain, "Bullshit!" and stomping out. I guess one of my ancestors was there with me, after all.
The written description of the 4 hour class sounded interesting. How do you keep your soul and heart healthy when your life is crumbling. At least that is how I interpreted the outline.
Okay, I believe almost anything and everything is possible. I know that we are living in fields of energy and some of us are receptive and open to different types of energy. I have never seen a ghost, but I know that some people believe they have. I believe that each of us finds what it is that we need to keep whole and happy. Finally, just to end this paragraph, I think each of us has our very own definition of whole and happy.
The course was not a course at all, but a circle of believers channeling their ancestors. Dennis and I were the only ones that were unaware of what the evening entailed. But both of said we wanted to try something different, and this definitly fit that bill.
The theory behind what is called "Constellations" is that we are all protected and our lives are affected by seven generations before us and we in turn protect and affect the lives of seven generations in front of us. We have healthy and unhealthy ancestors, and we can ask them to guide us and protect us. Again, this is my interpretation, and since I didn't get any of this from reading the course description, take it for what it is worth.
So here we were, sitting in this group of believers, two fairly open minded skeptics.
There were to be two constellations that evening, and we would all take part in both. We would either be the person to be healed, a receptor or a active audience participant. We were both okay with the last, but, unfortunately, we both ended up being receptors.
A receptor, by my definition, was playing a role assigned by the facilitator. I think, however, a receptor was actually suppose to channel the ancestor, and speak the words the ancestor wanted to speak.
No one ever spoke to me or Dennis, but they sure were speaking to some of the participants.
I won't bore you with the details, but a few highlights are worth repeating.
We had the woman from Belgium that played a healthy ancestor, and was suppose to be supporting the mother of the little girl who was being healed. She was a lousy healthy ancestor, wailing and crying loudly through the whole experience. I wouldn't have minded that so much, but the facilitator kept making us repeat the whole process every single time she broke down.
There was the woman who played the mother who just couldn't get her role correct. The facilitator asked her if she drank, and the woman said, "No." Aw, crap, we had to go through the whole think again until she finally admitted she drank. The woman couldn't pick up a cue for love or money. I think the only thing she really wanted was hugs and demanded them of everyone.
I guess the rest of the people were normal, they just believed and felt something that neither of us could.
Half way through the process, I pictured my dad standing up, yelling, with due distain, "Bullshit!" and stomping out. I guess one of my ancestors was there with me, after all.
Saturday, January 24, 2009
What Are the Odds?
Friday was an interesting day. In fact, it was so interesting that I will write two different entries. Oh, wow! Your interest has really piqued, hasn't it?
I had an 8 am appointment with my doctor and Dennis had a 9 am appointment with the physical therapist at Courage Center. His Metro Mobility pickup was scheduled for 8:22 am. Raquel has been arriving around 7:35 am. I woke up a bit early to help Dennis get medicated and dressed so that he would be ready on time. It was a release day at work (teachers work, students do not attend), so if I was a bit late, it would not be a problem.
Everything was in order and should have gone smoothly. But, alas, life kicked in and gave a swift one in the butt.
Dennis' anti-constipation meds started working around midnight, and he had been up all night. He had been taking them for 2 days, so you never know when they will begin working. Except for the fact he had showered that afternoon, and the sheets had been changed, there was no other warning that Friday am would be the time for the crap to begin.
If you aren't reading between the lines, this all means that Dennis was a mess in the morning, he hadn't gotten much sleep (so natch, neither had I) and he needed extra time on the toilet and help with clean up.
All was well until 7:35. Raquel had not shown up. I called her. She was somewhere between here and there and driving. She does not have a license, if you remember. She said time wasn't an issue, since she could drive him to Courage Center. Only problem was, if he missed another Metro Ride (it's been a tough month), they have the option of kicking him out of the program. He needed to make that ride.
And I needed to make my own appointment. "I won't worry about what I have no control over." Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. I was going to the doctor and needed to keep my blood pressure down.
I made it to the clinic on time. The only thing was there were no lights on anywhere. The door was open, but there was no electricity. Which, in this day and age, means no lights, no computers, thus no doctor visits. If you can't find a patient on the computer, the patient does not exist. I couldn't even give the blood that I had fasted for and gave up my morning coffee so not to contaminate the results.
I left wondering, what are the odds? Well, actually, the odds that all of these events would happen are pretty good. Dennis is either constipated or pooping all of the time. Raquel is not dependable and flaky as all get out. Very few people can operate a business of any type, without electricity. So if one were to place a bet, one betting against all of this happening in one 2 hour period would most likely lose.
And that is how the day began.
I had an 8 am appointment with my doctor and Dennis had a 9 am appointment with the physical therapist at Courage Center. His Metro Mobility pickup was scheduled for 8:22 am. Raquel has been arriving around 7:35 am. I woke up a bit early to help Dennis get medicated and dressed so that he would be ready on time. It was a release day at work (teachers work, students do not attend), so if I was a bit late, it would not be a problem.
Everything was in order and should have gone smoothly. But, alas, life kicked in and gave a swift one in the butt.
Dennis' anti-constipation meds started working around midnight, and he had been up all night. He had been taking them for 2 days, so you never know when they will begin working. Except for the fact he had showered that afternoon, and the sheets had been changed, there was no other warning that Friday am would be the time for the crap to begin.
If you aren't reading between the lines, this all means that Dennis was a mess in the morning, he hadn't gotten much sleep (so natch, neither had I) and he needed extra time on the toilet and help with clean up.
All was well until 7:35. Raquel had not shown up. I called her. She was somewhere between here and there and driving. She does not have a license, if you remember. She said time wasn't an issue, since she could drive him to Courage Center. Only problem was, if he missed another Metro Ride (it's been a tough month), they have the option of kicking him out of the program. He needed to make that ride.
And I needed to make my own appointment. "I won't worry about what I have no control over." Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. I was going to the doctor and needed to keep my blood pressure down.
I made it to the clinic on time. The only thing was there were no lights on anywhere. The door was open, but there was no electricity. Which, in this day and age, means no lights, no computers, thus no doctor visits. If you can't find a patient on the computer, the patient does not exist. I couldn't even give the blood that I had fasted for and gave up my morning coffee so not to contaminate the results.
I left wondering, what are the odds? Well, actually, the odds that all of these events would happen are pretty good. Dennis is either constipated or pooping all of the time. Raquel is not dependable and flaky as all get out. Very few people can operate a business of any type, without electricity. So if one were to place a bet, one betting against all of this happening in one 2 hour period would most likely lose.
And that is how the day began.
Wednesday, January 21, 2009
Obama, Our President
Since I work in a school, most of the people that I come in contact with during the day are hard-core democrats. Political talk is usually pretty one-sided and those few on the other end of the spectrum usually don't get involved in the conversation. So basically, I live my day life in a world where everyone pretty much agrees on who should be elected for any office.
I also teach in a poorer section of a metropolitan area, and most of our families are African American. We have a few other ethnicities represented, but for the most part, our students are black.
Yesterday, a school in North Minneapolis was the perfect place to be if you are a democrat. It was even a better place to be if you supported Obama. The mood was positive and energetic. At the same time, it was also peaceful and accepting.
Today, the full moon kicked in and life was back to normal. Well, I guess Obama can't fix the whole world in 24 hours. Drat.
I also teach in a poorer section of a metropolitan area, and most of our families are African American. We have a few other ethnicities represented, but for the most part, our students are black.
Yesterday, a school in North Minneapolis was the perfect place to be if you are a democrat. It was even a better place to be if you supported Obama. The mood was positive and energetic. At the same time, it was also peaceful and accepting.
Today, the full moon kicked in and life was back to normal. Well, I guess Obama can't fix the whole world in 24 hours. Drat.
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
Another Accident
I received one of those dreaded phone calls at work today. Dennis had fallen.
He did not hurt himself this time, however. Somehow he broke a window in his room, but managed to walk away without a scratch. Raquel, though, was worried about him. He skipped his Courage Center visit and went back to bed for the day. She said he even wanted his lunch in bed.
So I came home, and made a call to his doctor. His nurse called me back and assured me that she would talk to the doctor today. It's bad enough that Dennis should have to deal with this disease, but he should not have to deal with depression in addition.
Oh, and the medicine for the radio-active test, did not arrive from Japan, so the test scheduled for this week will need to be rescheduled. We are hoping that the doctors are able to schedule next weeks tests and the cancelled tests for the same period of time. Wouldn't that be nice?
He did not hurt himself this time, however. Somehow he broke a window in his room, but managed to walk away without a scratch. Raquel, though, was worried about him. He skipped his Courage Center visit and went back to bed for the day. She said he even wanted his lunch in bed.
So I came home, and made a call to his doctor. His nurse called me back and assured me that she would talk to the doctor today. It's bad enough that Dennis should have to deal with this disease, but he should not have to deal with depression in addition.
Oh, and the medicine for the radio-active test, did not arrive from Japan, so the test scheduled for this week will need to be rescheduled. We are hoping that the doctors are able to schedule next weeks tests and the cancelled tests for the same period of time. Wouldn't that be nice?
Monday, January 19, 2009
Low Blood Pressure, Again
Dennis is exhausted. He is tired of fighting back. Thankfully, that is just how he is feeling at this moment in time.
His blood pressure is low, and has been for the last 24, or more, hours. It was an extra day off for me, and he really wanted to do stuff, but everything we did took so much time and effort.
He is laying in bed now, sucking up Hagen Daz ice cream and watching Oprah gush over herself.
He'll be better in a day or two. His blood pressure will be back to normal, we will be in Rochester, eating bad food and his doctors will have ruled out Shy-Drager, lifting that perpetual cloud over his head.
Until later,
Ann and Dennis
His blood pressure is low, and has been for the last 24, or more, hours. It was an extra day off for me, and he really wanted to do stuff, but everything we did took so much time and effort.
He is laying in bed now, sucking up Hagen Daz ice cream and watching Oprah gush over herself.
He'll be better in a day or two. His blood pressure will be back to normal, we will be in Rochester, eating bad food and his doctors will have ruled out Shy-Drager, lifting that perpetual cloud over his head.
Until later,
Ann and Dennis
Sunday, January 18, 2009
Sunday
Dennis and I drove to Eau Claire today to have Sunday lunch with my parents. We don't do it often enough, and we don't stay long when we do go, but we always have a nice visit.
Unfortunately, Dennis' blood pressure was low again today, and he almost passed out after lunch.
So a note to my mother and father.
M&D, this doesn't happen every day. Most days Dennis is fine and can go through the day without these type of issues. Don't spend time worrying about me, even though I know you do. I have chosen to be with Dennis, with or without this disease, whatever it is called. We are okay, and we are happy, and we laugh everyday.
Okay, this is cheesy and cheap, but it's honest. I don't want anyone to spend energy worrying about how life is going for me. I am sure that Dennis does not want you to worry, either.
Until later,
Ann and Dennis
ps: thanks for caring, though!
Unfortunately, Dennis' blood pressure was low again today, and he almost passed out after lunch.
So a note to my mother and father.
M&D, this doesn't happen every day. Most days Dennis is fine and can go through the day without these type of issues. Don't spend time worrying about me, even though I know you do. I have chosen to be with Dennis, with or without this disease, whatever it is called. We are okay, and we are happy, and we laugh everyday.
Okay, this is cheesy and cheap, but it's honest. I don't want anyone to spend energy worrying about how life is going for me. I am sure that Dennis does not want you to worry, either.
Until later,
Ann and Dennis
ps: thanks for caring, though!
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